A Mobile Phone Shattered a Family – How Counseling Rebuilt It

*A Mobile Phone Shattered a Family – How Counseling Rebuilt It*

In the villages of Chittoor district, the mobile phone arrived as a boon. Farmers check crop prices, students attend online classes, and families stay connected with one another. Yet, quietly, it has also introduced a new crisis into the hearts of rural families: extramarital affairs.

A decade ago, the reasons for separation were typically poverty or dowry issues. Today, in our field work, we observe a different cause in over 40% of cases. It begins with a simple missed call, a WhatsApp message, or a friendship formed on social media; what starts as a pastime evolves into an emotional bond, slowly destroying a happy family. Often, while the husband works in a city like Bengaluru or Tirupati, the wife is left alone at home with her phone—or vice versa. Loneliness, a lack of proper guidance, and the ease of connecting with strangers online are eroding the trust between spouses.

It is not just the husband and wife who are most affected, but their young children. When trust is broken, arguments ensue. These arguments escalate into daily conflicts. Eventually, one partner leaves the home, while the other refuses to compromise due to ego. Although they remain legally married, in reality, they live apart. Their children end up becoming what we call "living orphans"—parents who are alive, yet the children are left without a family.

We encountered such a family in Irala Mandal. To protect their privacy, let us call them Sunitha and Prakash. They had been married for six years and had two daughters, aged four and two. Prakash was a driver, and Sunitha was a homemaker; the couple was happy. Prakash had even bought Sunitha a smartphone so she could video-call him whenever he was away on trips.

One day, Sunitha received a call from an unknown number. The person on the other end spoke kindly and claimed to understand her loneliness. With no one else to share her feelings with, Sunitha began talking to him. Gradually, daily conversations ensued. Prakash grew suspicious upon noticing Sunitha constantly on the phone. One night, he saw the messages. Enraged, he beat her and left for his mother's house. Overcome by shame and fear, Sunitha took her two children and returned to her parents' home. For five months, the two little girls did not see their parents together. The elder daughter stopped attending the Anganwadi center; she would constantly ask, "Where is Nana?" When the field team from our *Rural Rehabilitation Centre for the Physically Challenged (Registered: 13/10/1998)* discovered the couple during a family survey, they were in a state of deep despair. They loved their children, but their egos and anger overshadowed that love.

Our family counseling project does not assign blame. We are neither the police nor the courts; we act more like elders of the family. The wife sat down separately with our female counselor, Sunitha, who helped her understand how a momentary lapse in judgment—driven by emotion—could ruin her children's future. Meanwhile, our male counselor, Prakash, helped the husband learn to control his anger and realize that his wife needed his time and attention, not just a mobile phone.

After four sessions, we brought them together. We helped them break the problematic contact, taught them about digital boundaries, and showed them how to use mobile phones for family well-being rather than destruction. We even had them make a pledge in front of their children. Today, Prakash uses a simple keypad phone for daily needs and reserves his smartphone only for essential tasks. Their family is happy once again.

Sir, this is not an isolated case. Over the past 12 months, we have counseled 112 couples in Chittoor whose marriages were on the verge of collapse due to extramarital affairs stemming from mobile phone usage. *78 families have now been reunited.* 143 children have been reunited with their parents.

Our goal is to establish a *"Family Digital Awareness and Counseling Center"*—a place where we not only reunite families but also teach young rural couples how to use technology safely and keep trust alive.

Because while the mobile phone can connect the world, it should not tear a family apart

Thanks and Regards 

G. Kalavathi 

Secretary 

Rural Physically Handicapped Centre For Rehabilitation